My Magical Powers

I have the power to make inanimate objects disappear and reappear! Really and truly!

Case in point:

The morning was going well; I was ready in record time. The pets were fed, the house was in order. I was EARLY. Awesome. So when I was ready to leave for the office, I shoved my hand into my purse pocket for my keys. I keep my house keys and car keys clipped onto a tres cool Pink Panther keychain and keep them in the same right outside pocket of my grey messenger bag purse for easy access.

What the deuce? They weren't there!

I checked the left outside purse pocket. The one they are not supposed to be in, as my camera and phone are stowed safely in there so they don't get scratched.

Whew... no keys. No wait... Crap! No Keys!

I checked inside my bag. There WAS lot of miscellaneous stuff in there, but my missing keys weren't miscellaneously present. Holy cow, I have to clean this thing out one of these years...

I checked the purse pockets again. Work keys with Gumby and Pokey were sitting obediently in their assigned place like good little classic cartoon characters should, but the mischievious Pink Panther had escaped.

Car keysWell behaved, classic cartoon characters working hard at, well, work.


I searched my briefcase... dig, dig, dig. Nothing. No jingling noises. No keys. No Henry Mancini soundtrack to hint at Pinky's hiding spot.

The minutes were ticking away.

Crapity crap crap!

I checked the room where I had thrown, erm "carefully deposited" my purse the previous evening.

No keys on the floor.

I checked on and under the dining room table... maybe I left them there and the cats assumed Pinky was a new jangly (? jangly?? Okay, I make up words too) cat toy. When in doubt, ALWAYS blame the cats. Dammit. Not there either. Apologies, felines.

I checked the craftroom. Zilch.

I checked the hallway. A lot of furballs (gad I have to vacuum) but no shiny thingys.

I went back to my purse and searched again. Excuses for my lateness soon began to float inside my head.

"Hello, work? I won't be in today. My car won't start."
(Well, it wouldn't be a lie; it IS a titch difficult to start it without KEYS).

Then an Epiphany. Ahaha! I probably left them in my jacket pocket yesterday! Silly moi! I poked around the pockets, only to discover that kleenex I have had in there for like, forever. Crap! And Ewww!

I evil-eyed my messenger bag lying helpless at the front door, this close to dumping everything out, pissed that my wonderfully organized morning had swiftly evaporated.

I plunged my hand into that first purse pocket for the third time.

And pulled out my keys, Pink Panther fob and all.

Car keysDon't wave at me all innocently like that Pinky

Yes, I am Magic. I made them reappear out of sheer willpower.

It's the only plausible explanation.

28 People would rather be commenting:

CorvusCorax12 said...

hate when that happens lol
hope the rest of the day goes smother

Heather said...

Sounds like something I would do! I love your Gumby & Pokey keychains, by the way!! :)

Daisy said...

It seems like the Pink Panther was lying down on the job!

JMM said...

I've started a few days like this. Even working an evening shift, and having all day to get ready, I still manage to do it! Be blessed!

Sam Liu said...

Oh I feel your pain, I hate it when I loose something! I'm an overly organised person and the minute I misplace one single item I go insane.
Thank goodness your magical super powers came to the rescue :D.

Lynn said...

Lovin' the cartoon key fobs. And I think I also have that same power. Oy.

Babs-beetle said...

I often wonder how keys can disappear and reappear all the time. Maybe I have the same magical powers, or maybe it's a conspiracy, and all of the keys around the world send out messages to each other, like "It's Maureen Kuppe's day today. Give it ten minutes, then re-appear in the first place she looked."

ReformingGeek said...

You have been visited by the key troll.

It probably was the cats. They put them back while you were searching in other places.

Sneaky beastards.

Gnetch said...

Hahaha. I lose something all the time too!

JoJo said...

Sneaky Pink Panther trying to Gaslight you!!!!

Sistertex said...

Glad you found them. Reminds me of something that happened once. Had a greyhound I'd recently brought into my home who was so completely scared of people. He would mostly hangout in his crate, door open. (Later he was used to us and we got to put the crate away...but anywho...).

Shortly after getting him inside, obiously from the outside, the car in the garage started beeping - the panic alarm going off. Then suddenly it would stop...then a minute or so later would start again. After I was sure no one had broken into the garage and no one was in the car I had to figure out how the heck this was happening I began looking for my keys. Could not find them anywhere. Then I realized I also could not find Shasta (name of the scared new gh boy). I went into the room where his crate was and here he was chewing on the fob. Turning the alarm off and on. He gracefully gave them up, but he really had me going for a while until I could figure out what the problem was.

Funny how those car keys can really screw up your day isn't it.

:) Great post.

Irene said...

Isn't it odd how that happens. It happens to me all the time. I can't figure it out. I must be blind the times before and suddenly see the light the third time.

Kisma said...

I have this very problem. I blame my purse! It likes to hide them from me.

Mercy Langille said...

Keys have that bad habit of disappearing when you need them most...and somehow they are in the place you first looked when you do finally find them.

J said...

Can you teach me your ways so I can do that in a time of crisis, too?? Thanks...

Richard said...

Awesome, a pink panther keychain!

DJ Kirkby said...

That's just plain spooky. I make things dissapear but they never come back. Teach me your trick when you figure it out. I'd forgotten all about Gumby and Pokey; they don't have them over here in England.

Rathi said...

AH!!!

I hate it when that happens..... but i guess the Panther was on a mission or something...

Anonymous said...

Once I had to call work and tell them I couldn't make it in on time because the car was missing.
Apparently my brother decided to "borrow" it while I was gone earlier.

JD at I Do Things said...

SHAZAM!

OK, I have to admit that once I saw Gumby and Pokey, all I could think about was running off to look up Gumby videos on YouTube.

But I'm glad you found your keys.

And now for those videos.

Maureen said...

Twain12: It was better. Once I GOT to work, that is.

Heather: Thanks! I grew up with G & P. I have the toys on my shelf at work too, so they are good key fobs for my work keys.

Daisy: I think so!

Thanks JMM! I know... since I obviously don't need my keys until I er, well, NEED them, it's always a last minute panic!

Sam: I am truly lucky to have these powers. I just have to remember that with great power, comes great responsibility. My uncle Ben taught me that. Or I heard it somewhere...

Lynn: Hopefully with the power of disappearance, you also possess the power of re-appearance!

Holy Crap Babs! You may be right! But how do you know that? Are you in league with The Keys????

Reforming Geek: Ha! Sneaky Beastards is right!!!!

Gnetch: Lets hope you find things all the time too!

Jo-Jo: He is an instigator alright. Or was that Woody Woodpecker? Well, both of them were troublemakers...

Ahahahahaha Sistertex!!! That was hilarious! Oh my, that would have freaked me out too! Ha! You should post that story on your blog!

Nora: I wish I could blame it on my failing eyesight... unfortunately I was wearing my glasses all the time. Geesh.

Ha Kisma! Yes, the evil purse ate them! Really!!! Although with all the crap I keep in my purse, the poor thing would be pretty sick...

Exactly Mercy! How the heck does that happen???

Ah Jennifer, I do believe you must be born with the power. It cannot be taught.

Lady Banana: No? Then we must form A League! We could have a Key Crest on the chest of our superhero disguises.

Richard: It IS awesome. Until he starts acting up...

Ah yes, DJ. You saw them when in Canada, no? Too bad you don't have them over there. Well, there is always the good ol' net to get your fix.

Ratz: A mission to screw with me! Darn that Pink Panther!

HA Lizzyland! Oh I would have been beside myself if the car was missing!!! I hope you told him off...

JD: Beware. The old shows we thought were so funny when kids are somehow very wierd and slightly disturbing when viewed as adults. I wonder what the makers of G&P were on when they did those...

James said...

I just hate it when a supposedly organized day is ruined and nothing gets done.

But I do hold you in awe for your sheer willpower to make things reappear. Turning the whole house upside down to search for a bunch of keys is no fun, especially when you are pressed for time.

By the way, if the keys are really missing and you believe the cats are the culprit, how do you cajole them to hand over the keys?

Ca88andra said...

I think keys have a life all of their own, and I'm sure they can move themselves to all parts of the house!

JulyJeanie said...

LOL! What an amazing and cute story! Although, at the time, I'm sure cute wasn't the word you would have used! I've done the same thing, sort of. Just the other day I LOST my favorite coffee cup! I looked high and low, everywhere! (or so I thought), I finally walked across to my neighbors. We frequently spend time together over the occasional cup of coffee. I thought, well.....maybe I left it over there, but then, I thought, wouldn't she have said something if I had?? I checked with her anyway, and I had her looking in her cabinets, sink and of course, her dishwasher! LOL! I felt like a real ding-a-ling! No coffee cup was found, well, there were cups, just not MY cup. I walked back across the lawn thinking that it had simply disappeared. Wasn't until then that it struck me. I had thrown a few dishes in our dishwasher the other day because I simply did not feel up to washing them, but I didn't like them cluttering up the sink either, LOL! I came back into the house and went straight to the dishwasher and opened it. Ha! There it was! Ahh well, if nothing else it provided a good laugh for us all! ;o)

Swubird said...

Maureen:

This post is as real as it gets. I cannot count the number of times my Queen has lost her keys only to find them again in her purse. That goes for her cell phone as well. Of course, it would take a team of archeologists a month of hard digging to completely excavate her purse, but we don't talk about that.

Happy trails.

Maureen said...

Ah James, if it WAS the cats, they were smart enough to carefully place them back in the pocket of my purse before I was the wiser. Those crafty felines...

Ca88andra: I do believe you are right! The Secret Life of Keys. Its a movie sure to be a hit!

Ahahahaha July Jeanie!!!! Oh that sounds just like something I would do (so sorry about that...) That was a hilarious story; thank you so much for sharing it!

Ha Swu! I'll BET you don't talk about it. If you did, you can be sure if she hit you with her purse, that sucker would hurt!!!! ;)

Maureen said...

Ah so I am not the only one LaraAnn! Good to know.... and my condolences to you ;)

Brenda Grolle said...

They were playing hide and seek with you.

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