So Obviously I Wasn't The Best Mother...

It has come to my attention, 15 years after the fact however, that apparently I was NOT a leading candidate for "Mother Of The Year" in the 90's.

For when I read the article 10 Toys That Failed

I realized that four of the 10 failures due to safety recalls were and STILL ARE in my home.

Poor daughter. I subjected her to Pokemon, dolls, toys and outdoor games that I now find out were deathtraps just waiting to spring.

I will admit these suckers are dangerous... especially in the hands of a klutz like moi. Many a time I aimed, poised and threw my lawn dart with great finesse... only to find it rocketing straight up and land with a thud mere inches BEHIND ME.

Ah the Easy Bake. I had one when I was young. It turned everything to ashes. The best thing I ever had with this set was the bubblegum. Yep, they actually made BUBBLEGUM for you to BAKE. I kid you not. After burning the first batch to a reeking, boiling tar, I found that by simply emptying the packet straight into my mouth, the "raw" gum was far better. So it only boggles the mind that I bought one for my own daughter 30 years later.

I thought these things would be the coolest toy ever. Lucky for us, after the first few "flights", the stupid thing broke. Natch. Oh well, at least it never had the chance to put an eye out.

Now THIS makes me sad. Sad because we probably collected a gazillion of these... we had so many (I think Burger King made it a set of 100 different toys, so naturally we tried to COLLECT THEM ALL). Yep, we have full "chains" of these balls all linked together in boxes somewhere under the stairs in the basement. Along with the lawn darts, an Easy Bake and a broken Sky Dancer.

Sad too that I never turned the Pokemon balls in for all those free french fries.

11 People would rather be commenting:

Daisy said...

Daisy's "mom" here:
Remember Creepy Crawlers? A hot iron bug mold. Just plug it in, wait until the bug is cooked and pull the boiling hot bug right out of the hot iron mold. Cool!

Venom said...

Add me to the Not Mother of the Year list too.

My kids rode bikes without helmets. Still worse, they rode horses without helmets either.

Both of them are pretty sure I was okay with them suffering bodily injury.

Personally, I have no clue how my entire generation survived to procreate - so it was before the times that the government and every buggerdy organization saw fit to point out all the hazards of growing up. They've pretty much sucked the fun out of childhood, I think.

Julie H said...

We had all of them but the lawn darts lol

Belle said...

We had the oven and Sky Dancers. My girls loved them both. Great post!

Iram said...

OMG I used to have a Sky Dancer doll, it was the most amazing thing ever! :D


Babs-beetle said...

I dread to think what they'd make of the toys we played with as kids.

All toys were painted with lead based paint (along with baby cots). They were held together with bits of sharp metal. In fact most toys were made from metal. Dolls eyes were fixed in with bits of sharp wire. The list of dangers in those days is never ending, yet I don't recall a single 'toy' accident in our home of 7 kids!

I agree with Venom. They have taken all the fun out of childhood now.

Maureen said...

Daisy's Mom! Yes I DO! WE had that too! Well, my brother had it and tortured me with creepy crawlers continuously...

Venom: Yep; I can see why some of these recalls are necessary; but geez, where is the parenting? Why isn't someone saying "Don't do that, it's stupid, or it'll put your eye out!"

Mom Taxi Julie: Oh the lawn darts I've had since childhood. I wasn't afraid to ever use them until I heard of all the hazards. Until then, yeah, they were fun!

Belle: See? I don't see the difference between Sky Dancers and boy's helicopter toys. Jeepers; a PENCIL can put an eye out but they haven't banned those... YET.

Iram: Yeah, she flew well until one of her wings broke off... poor thing.

Exactly Babs! I think common sense has gone the way of the Dodo.

choochoo said...

Hehe. When i was a kid, it was pretty normal for the kids (including me) in my hometown to carry around big knifes in their belts. Cause you never know when you suddenly need to whittle something. Do I need to point out that this was out in the country?

JoJo said...

Lawn darts were taken off the shelves in the states so long ago. Hey our playground stuff was on concrete and blacktop when I was in school in the 70's. No such thing as helmets, knee or elbow pads either.

Bart said...

My parents refused to give us any dangerous toys, so I had to make them myself. I especially have fond memories of the crossbow I made once. It was capable of shooting a darts arrow through a multiplex plate...

Jay said...

Ah, it's a wonder we all survived, isn't it? Back in my own childhood we had lead toys, child-sized metal knitting needles, 'toy' chemistry sets (with real chemicals, including copper sulphate which I thought was really pretty) and a kind of lego precursor where you could build things with plastic bricks which you slotted between metal rods. I still remember how unwise it was to fall on a half-constructed building!

And yet, here I still am. ;)

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