Open Letter To Columbia House
A few years ago, I made the foolish mistake of signing up for the Columbia House DVD club. I fulfilled my subscription and then quit the club, finding their prices higher (especially with postage) than those at my local stores. And I didn't have to wait weeks to get my movies either. No, it just wasn't for me.
Since that time, however, Columbia House has nagged, pleaded and cajoled me endlessly to re-subscribe as I was "such a good customer".
I have received numerous phone calls, mailings and emails. All those "special offers" I have politely refused. Yesterday, since I was home on a vacation day, a new tactic reared it's ugly head.
Now I am getting recorded message phone calls. Yup, I answer the phone, and after a long pause, a recorded commercial is playing requesting I re-join "The Club".
They just DON'T GET IT.
Therefore, here is my Open Letter to Columbia House Canada:
I do not want your cheap CDs
I do not want your DVDs
Please stop calling me at home
I will not order over the phone
I will not order over the net
Can't you record it in your system yet?
I will not order by snail mail
I will not order by e-mail
Please stop your letters
Please stop your calls
You're driving me up the walls
I've been polite
I've been sincere
I do not want your products here!
I will not "click here" with my mouse
I will NOT subscribe
COLUMBIA HOUSE!
Thank you.
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11 People would rather be commenting:
Billy Mac said...
I've noticed in my stats that your blog is sending traffic my way...yet I did a search of my blog and a search of my gmail account and can't see any request of a review or a completed review...did I mess up? If you are waiting then please email me at submityourblog@gmail.com and yell at me alittle becasue I think your blog is great. I would have emailed you personally but I don't see a link to your email account...Thanks.
Critique My Blog
19/6/07 12:00
Phara said...
I think several of us probably need to copy and paste that letter...
19/6/07 12:57
CircesMagic said...
(Stands up and applauds) Here is what happens at our house...Cue ringing phone....I pick up the phone and say Hello...one more Hello then I hang up, if your not quick enough to answer then oh well, try another time, I am however looking forward to my move because that means I get a NEW number and less calls, WOOHOO!!
19/6/07 15:21
BonnieRose said...
let's hope they get the msge.. lol
19/6/07 15:32
Rachael said...
I feel your pain!!! UGH!!
19/6/07 16:06
j said...
I feel your pain, too...but I really like your poem! :-)
19/6/07 16:34
Ingrid said...
I think the Witness Protection Program is the only way to truly escape Columbia House. They're very needy....like psycho ex-boyfriend needy. It's creepy!
20/6/07 00:52
LOL!!! Then sign me up...
20/6/07 08:37
Heather said...
I love it! I've had my dealings with Columbia House too. No thanks!
20/6/07 10:51
Jill said...
Ugh! Sounds like a giant pain!!!!!!! I knew there was some reason I didn't sign up!
20/6/07 14:18
JMC said...
Ha! I see I'm not the only goofy poetry writer in cyberspace. :) I'm actually posting an ode to my coffee maker tomorrow.
21/6/07 11:52
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