Old Friends and Enemies

My 5th birthday party, 1965Thanks to Facebook, a couple of days ago I was thrilled to receive an email from a girlfriend I haven't seen in oh, at least 30 years. Even though we lived across the street from each other and went to school together, Cathy and I lost touch after graduation. We moved away, got married and went on with our lives. But she was a good friend and I still remember the sleepovers we used to have at each other's houses when we were very young. Now we are both grown with girls of our own and I can't wait to catch up with her.

It got me to thinking about people I went to school with again. Over the years I often wondered what became of my classmates. I never attended our reunion years ago, so I've had no contact with nearly all the kids I saw everyday in the Sixties and Seventies. I wish I could find out what some of them are doing now... what kind of people they turned out to be.

Others... well, suffice to say, I am ecstatic I never heard from again.

I can't believe I'm actually posting this photo of me at age 15One girl especially. You see in junior high, this person took great pleasure in belittling others (not just me, but I was her favorite target because I let her bully me) and was a real, well, I'll just say it.


She had a great knack of knowing just how to humiliate others. Like a character in a teen movie, she weilded great power with all kinds of cronies following her around school. She was loud, abusive and mean.

And I tried my best to stay out of her way.

Karma is a Bitch too, though. One of my first jobs while still a teenager was working as a medical office assistant for an Obs/Gyne physician. One day who should come in for her post-abortion check-up, but the nasty girl who made my early high school years a nightmare. I'll never forget the shock on her face when she realised it was me sitting behind the desk with her chart in my hands. She knew I now had the power to make her squirm and spread awful rumors about HER. I could get back at her for all the kids she made miserable for years.

But I would NEVER have used it to sink to her level. I knew better. For a moment I felt a surge of tempting revenge, then I felt satisfaction.

And then.... all I felt was sorrow and pity for her.

Something I should have felt all along.

16 People would rather be commenting:

Cupcake Blonde said...

This is because you are a beautiful person inside and out and she is ugly. She has to make other people feel ugly so she feels better about herself. Kudos to you for not sinking to her ruthless level. Who knows, maybe if you went to one of those reunions she will have gorwn up and thank you for not rubbing that moment of weakness you saw in her face.

Boatwoman said...

Awww how nice to be back in touch with someone after all that time. I still have contact with a couple of my childhood friends.
Bullying is the lowest. But sadly they will sink to the lowest levels of humanity. Have you thought of trying Friends Reunited, to see if anyone else is around. That is how I found a couple of my school friends.
Kind regards.

Elan Morgan said...

You were a dish!

Jill said...

It's too bad every bully can't have an opportunity like that to have to face one of the people they bullied in a situation where they are in the less powerful position.

It's so sad, the way people can be to each other. Hopefully that gave her the chance to see you as a person and think about things she'd done. :-( :-( :-(

Burfica said...

I can see where your coming from, but I still get a little sick satisfaction that the evil wicked prom queen is now fat!!! hehehehehe

Anonymous said...

Amazing story. (And really, WHAT IS IT with our school stories today?) I wish I could tell kids "Don't let them bother you, because in 10, 20 or 30 years, it won't matter at all!" But you can't do that. Kids can't think that far ahead, and don't believe adults anyway. I wish they would. Think of all the hurt they could save themselves.

The Egel Nest said...

I felt sorry (pity) for those people also...even IN high school...

This post was awesome...and it shows your true character...

What a wonderful read!

The Egel Nest

Canadian flake said...

You are obviously a better person than she is...hopefully she learned something that day...that bullying is not the answer..

HAT Mommy said...

That is cool that you found an old friend.

As for the biatch, we have all had those...somehow or another.

Anywhoo, I just wanted to say how much I love our blog...and how silly I was today when I was supposed to be working I actually said (aloud), "Ah...I'd rather be blogging" and I thought of you.

Rachel said...

I really enjoyed reading this.
You were too cute. So pretty and wholesome looking.
You, are the better person for not sinking to her level. How frightening that instead of seeing a friend in you, she saw a threat.
So sad.
I do so enjoy reading you. Thanks for always being interesting and entertaining.

toners said...

Great entry, Maureen. Good for you for rising above her level...I was also bullied, and so I understand just how you feel. I hope I can equip my DD with some tools because I certainly didn't know how to deal with it properly. And as you said, Karma is an amazing thing. You ROCK! (((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

I was CRAZY about a girl when I was 15 and she dumped me. "She'll see," I said. "She'll want me back someday." 10 years later, she sent me a card, then a month or so later another, saying that she missed me and I was wonderful and sweet and kind and handsome etc. etc. etc. I was already married at the time but I gave it to my wife to use her special secret woman language decoder, and she said this woman was definitely interested in more than just a casual catch-up. I chucked the cards in the trash.

My revenge took 10 years, but it really wasn't as great as I hoped it would be.

DJ Kirkby said...

Excellent post, love the final statement.

Bruce Johnson said...

I had the same opportunity with my ex-wife.....if you sink to their level, you are no better than they are, such is the concept of understanding and compassion. Something the bitches will never understand, and it drives them nuts.

Maureen said...

Aw, thanks everyone... .what a wonderful response. Thank you.

It is a story I will always remember; and I make sure my daughter knows it too - so when/if she gets teased or bullied, she knows just how sad the bullies really are... and that the same thing happened to HER mom...

Boatwoman: No, I have never heard of Friends Reunited, I will have to check it out, thank you!

Nicole: That is so funny! Thanks to Kathy, I now have my own Rather be Blogging .com domain too... I'll soon be using it. Whoo Hoo!

Marlee said...

Ur looking so pretty in the '75 pic!

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