There's a Remote Chance

Ahhh! Too many remotes!!!
We have a titch too many remote controls.

Yes, "titch" is too a word.

Okay, maybe not.


This heap are just those I grabbed in a few minutes this morning from our living room and Daughter's game room in the basement.

Given time, I am sure I can unearth even more from old VCRs and video cameras still buried, forgotten and collecting dust in drawers and closets somewhere.

My laptop had a tiny remote too; but it unfortunately has gone to that Great Remote Control Pile In The Sky (better known as the Brady Road Landfill). Um. Yeah. I REALLY miss that one... I find it extremely taxing to reach those buttons all the way over there ON MY LAP.

Yesterday hubby added yet another one to our already impressive arsenal: a remote control for the new air conditioner.

Brilliant. Something else to waste batteries on.

And here I was snickering at my mother in law's remote-controlled tower fan on the weekend. That bugger was so complex, it kept turning itself off at irregular time intervals. It had no less than six different options you programmed by pressing the buttons a certain number of times in a particular sequence, depending on the number of green and/or red LEDs on the tower [High, Medium, Low, Auto Shut-Off, Sleep Timer with multiple time settings and "Random"]. Instructions in the User Manual (yes, a User Manual for a frickin' FAN) were indecipherable. So now she simply presses the On/Off button on it's stand.

Ironically it makes a mockery of the "control" part of Remote Control if you think about it (without causing your head to explode).

Let me make this clear; we don't have large rooms, nor are we incapacitated in any way. We are fully capable of walking (or leaning) the short distance to the item(s) in question. Instead, we engage in the highly entertaining game of "Where's the Damn Remote?".

Sadly, I think I have just solved the long-lost mystery as to the origin of my Big Fat Butt™.


24 People would rather be commenting:

Curly Glamour Girlie said...

On my bedside table alone I've got the air conditioner remote and the stereo remote. Both of which come in might handy actually when I don't want to get out of bed to turn down the a/c or turn off the stereo.

But that's quite a cavalcade of remotes you've got there.

Jo Beaufoix said...

Maybe they are having remote sex. Or close sex. therefore resulting in offspring. Just a thought. ;)

Karen MEG said...

Okay, Maureen, that's a WHOLE lotta remotes!!! I think we have about that many, but most are hidden and fermenting under various sofa cushions...

Vegas Princess said...

Oh we have too many remotes as well. On my nightstand there is the remote for the celing fan, the stereo, the Tivo, the DVD player and the TV. Downstairs is another celing fan remote, the Tivo remote, TV, VCR, DVD, Surround sound system, Wii remotes. Plus there is one for the computer and the laptop (unnecessary as you mentioned). WAY TOO MANY!

Kathy said...

I'm sorry, but you're going to need a 12-step program to get off your remote addiction. Yowsa!

Of course, I'm not that much better and I don't know what all mine are for. I just pick one up, point, and hope it does something to the object in its path.

Maureen said...

Curly Glamour Girlie: Now 2 at your bedside I can see... especially with a tiny baby. But 14 remotes? That's just in-sane.

Jo: Har!!! Remote sex. Hmmm... Doesn't sound fun At All.

Karen Meg: Doesn't the channel change when you sit on the sofa then?

Vegas Princess: Agreed. And Daughter loves that I labelled her game remote the way she calls it "Wii-mote".... :)

Kathy: Ha! I can just see you sitting on your couch, pressing buttons thinking nothing is happening when your garage door is going up and down all night!!!

Drowsey Monkey said...

OMG ... LOL! You know you're never going to figure out which remote goes to what item now that you've mixed them all up like that!

I only have one remote, I don't understand!

Ann(ie) said...

HA! You crack me up. And I concur titch is totally a word. I'm not sure how many remotes we have anymore. Ben has taken to throwing them in the trash and then giggling. It's big fun. =/

Jeff said...

I'm thinking you could use something like this.
What's really scary is we have one TV that you can only change the settings with the remote. Seriously.

Maureen said...

Drowsey Monkey: You know, I thought the same thing when I was done taking photos; how the heck I sorted them out again, I'll never know.

Ann(ie): Oh noes! Well, I guess the trash is better than the toilet... at least you could retrieve it.

Jeff: Hah, that's right! But I think I need about SIX of those! Wanna build me one? I'll pay... ;)

LadyBanana said...

We can never find the one we need at the right time!

Phoenix5 said...

Where I work we have a remote called the "Harmony" made by Logitech. Can you imagine paying over $400 for a remote control?!? This one will turn on your TV, DVD player, surround sound system, dim the lights and even "press play" on said DVD player... all with the push of ONE button! I think you're right about the source of so many "BFB"s! LMAO! The only problem is, you need a computer science degree to be able to program these stupid things...

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Wow! I'm impressed!!!!! I only have two - one for the tv & one for the DVD player. Hopefully Jo Beaufoix is wrong - wouldn't want mine reproducing.

Maureen said...

Lady Banana: Neither can we... obviously.

Phoenix5: $ 400 for a remote?? Crap. For THAT much, I'll get off my Big Fat Butt!

Jill: Niether do I -- we have far too many as it is.

Pand0ra Wilde said...

There's something incredibly FUN you can do with those tower fan remotes. It worked on the two my mother and I had.

Seems all those fans (at least the ones from the same company) will operate on the same remote. I discovered it by accident while trying to turn my own fan up and heaing my mom yell to "quit messing with my fan!"

Of course, once I knew I could jack with her fan I would just HAVE to do it once in awhile. Fortunately Mom has a sense of humor so we had fun with it. She also swears like a sailor so you can imagine what I got called during these rounds of fun.

I don't live with Mom anymore and my own tower fan bit the dust late last summer, so I have this extra fan remote...

Maureen said...

Oh Pand0ra, you are hilarious! I can just see the fans operating with "a mind of thier own"... and your mother swearing!!! And the offer of the remote? Well, dang, that is just SO tempting! Har!!!

toners said...

Hey, I think a couple of our remotes are in that pile! :)

VE said...

I'm going to invent ANOTHER remote. One that locates for you all of the ones that are missing.

Or maybe I'll just invent a little device where you can number each one and then stick a locator signal onto each and then have a master control stuck on the fridge to where you can hit any one of them and listen for the signal until it is found...

Janet said...

Yes, a remote for the remotes is in order here. We also have a remote for the air purification device. It only has 2 buttons on it. And on HGTV, I saw a remodel project where they installed a TOILET with a remote! I don't even want to think about that one! lol

Momo Fali said...

I have starting putting labels on all our remotes, just so I know what the heck they go to.

LceeL said...

It's really fun to stand outside the room and screw with the TV with the OTHER remote while they're in the living room using THEIR remote and trying to figure out why it won't do what it's supposed to do. Just sayin'.

lotus07 said...

First things first. I am currently looking for a remote control on ebay. I came across an old LaserDisc player in a junk store. Since they are getting harder and harder to find, I scarfed it up. Only it has no remote, which means some of its functions are not accessible without it. To get one from a re-seller is about $75, I am hopping that one pops up on ebay for much less.

Which brings up the next thing. Most things that have remotes can ONLY be operated with the remote. It is too expensive to put buttons on the actual appliance.

Finally, you have a remote for your Air Conditioner? My, my, you ARE decadent.

BusyDad said...

My favorite WTF remote? The car stereo remote. You just have to laugh.

Maureen said...

Toners: Ah, so THAT's what happened! Everyone else's remotes are finding their way to my house!

VE: OMG, don't give them the idea. The next thing you know, I'll be watching a commercial for one of those things on TV...

Janet: A remote for the toilet???? How friggin' far away are these people when they remember to flush??? Gahhhh!!!


Momo Fali: I think I need to do that too... or else print out that picture so I can remember where they all belong.


Iceel: Ohhh, you sneaky guy you... I am NOT reading this comment to hubby. Sounds like he would have a heyday.

Lotus07: Ah yes, the accessory of today's age. Used to be that collectors of action figures would say their value increased if you had the original accesssories. If anyone is collecting appliances in the future, they will value them on whether the remote is still there too.

And the remote for the air conditioner? Never been taken out of the stupid drawer in the top of the unit.

BusyDad: Ha! And I'll just BET Fury has it in the back seat, right? Right??? (oh, sure....)

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