Whilst scrubbing out the jacuzzi tub the other day, a job well past-due since I tend to avoid it at all costs, I had a thought (a daft habit I have while performing mind-numbing chores).
I thought: "I never, ever want to be a patient of Dr. Gregory House."
Now you may think it is because of one or more of the following:
1) Dr. House isn't real. Okay, I'll admit that if your physician doesn't exist it would in fact make examinations a titch more difficult.
2) Dr. House only takes extreme, life or death cases that no one else has been able to solve. Which wouldn't be that great in of itself.
3) Dr. House is mean. I would be in tears more than once if submitted to his infamous, so-called "beside manner".
No, it isn't because of any of those albeit semi-valid rationale.
The reason I wouldn't want to be a patient of Dr. Gregory House is because of the part in every freaking episode where they
break in go to the patient's home to ascertain the cause of the strange illness no one has come down with before.
Talk about painful! I can just imagine the excruciating scene:
As House's three Fellows enter her home, they are struck with a strange odor.
"Cat owner." One remarks, screwing up her nose in revulsion.
"Definitely. Could be cat scratch fever..." Another postulates.
"Nah. No tell-tale scratches on the patient. Hmmmm... looks like she has a dog too; and a shaggy one at that." The charming Aussie doc observed in that all-too sexy accent, pointing to the the hair-infested pet bed.
"More likely THIS is the culprit" the first Resident calls from the bathroom. As the other two enter they shake their heads in agreement, wincing at the soap scum and black mold growing around the jets in the tub.
"Yup, that's gotta be it alright. Take a sample for the lab" the ravishing Aussie instructs, grabbing his rucksack and pulling out a test tube and swab, offering it to the female Fellow.
"YOU take the sample! I'm not touching that!" She squeals, backing away in disgust.
So he shoves it at the Junior Fellow. Snapping on a pair of extra-thick latex gloves, he swears under his breath. "I always get stuck with the crap jobs..."
Which simply confirms that I need to cut back on watching medical dramas. Either that, or stop letting my mind wander while cleaning.
Or perhaps just simply cutting back on mundane chores in the first place. Yeah. I can do that.
As long as I'm not stricken with some horrible heretofore unknown sickness. Then I'm scrubbing MY House from top to bottom.
Just in case.
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