Ahhhh... Technology

It's been six months since I brought my new baby home. Erm, my Outlander baby that is.

And yet it still is providing me opportunities to both learn and laugh. Like discovering the numerous quirks of the GPS, satellite radio and even getting used to how the damn wipers work. How the heck can windshield wiper configurations vary so much from vehicle to vehicle? Of course my last car was near 10 years old (or "ancient" as my daughter insists) so innovations in the auto industry HAVE progressed a tad in the interim I guess.

Obviously the old Dodge Caravan never had Bluetooth.

I've finally gotten used to the voice commands it stubbornly prefers and how to be patient and wait for the "beep!" before responding, but I still ponder the irony that it can't pronounce the word "mobile".

A recent car-to-car communication (or perhaps more appropriately described as a "lack of communication") proves technology has a long way to go however.

I had just picked up daughter from a late evening University class, as her shared ride for the day had left early. Suddenly the radio mutes and the incoming call indicator light flashes on my indash screen. I pressed the pickup button on the wheel control panel, noting it's hubby's usual end-of-the-day-whaddya-want-for-dinner call.


"Hello!" he responds.

"Yeah hon. What's up?" (Like I didn't know).

"Hello?" is all he says.

I try again.


"Where are you?" he asks.

"I just picked daughter up from University."

"You're in an elevator?"

"No! The University! She had a late class!" Why I am yelling now, I have no idea...

"She had an accident????"


"NO! A LATE CLASS!" Now at this point, daughter bursts out laughing in the passenger seat. Which he CAN hear. Geez. Good thing I didn't even attempt to explain how it was her friend's turn to drive that day but didn't stay for the late class...

I try to remain composed. It's harder than I thought. Daughter's laughter is contagious and I begin to giggle too. Turning off the car fan and stretching as close to the microphone as possible while still attempting to navigate the turnoff to the highway at 80 KM/hour, I try again. "Helloooooo?"

"Geez. I can't hear you very well." he offers.

Doh! Rly?

"Call me back." We can tell he's getting a tad pissed now. Oops, sorry hon, but it really is too funny at this end. Which, by the way, we can hear you perfectly.

"Okay." giggle "Will do hon." snort

So I called HIS cell, shaking my head in wonder when my Bluetooth voice asks if I want to call the "MOBEEL" number for him.

Ring, ring, ring... he picks up.

"Hello, can you hear me know?" Gad I sound just like that dorky TV guy.

"NO!" hubby responds.

Well, that did it. Full-out hysterical laughter from the daughter and I.

What? My mind tries, unsuccesfully may I add, to process the fact that he CAN hear me ask if he can hear me, but he cannot, in fact, HEAR ME. This was getting ridiculous now.

So I offer a solution. "Just call me at home. We'll be there in 10 minutes."


The remainder of the trip was spent in hysterics. In OUR car that is. I can imagine the converstaion he was having with himself in HIS truck.

When we finally met up at home, I had to apologise. "Sorry honey, we really weren't laughing at YOU. We were laughing at technology.


But after witnessing the Look he shot back, I dare say I don't think he believed me.

18 People would rather be commenting:

Tsuki aka LittleGrayFox said...

lol! damn technology for turning us all into blubbering idiots! I don't have one installed, but I use a motorolla bluetooth speaker on my visor. The British robot lady mispronounces everyone's name so bad and she doesn't understand who I'm trying to call. So I finally changed the names in my phone to match.

My boyfriends name is no longer Greg. It's GAHREGORY (she pronounces it "gary-gory"). Sure, call him.

Babs-beetle said...

So did you find out what he was calling for? :)

Unknown said...

I love all the technology...although usually I am the dork trying to understand it!

I am a new follower of your blog!

Stephanie said...

I'm afraid to get one - I'd be forced to get bifocals just to see the blasted screen! I just don't take calls in the car and drive around lost a lot...

wherethehellwasi said...

Wow, you're way further ahead of the game than I am. I've got a BT-capable car and phone, but the only time I think to hook the two up is when I'm driving.

And if I try then, I get slapped with a robotic 'OPTION UNAVAILABLE WHILE VEHICLE IS IN MOTION!'

But if I wasn't in motion, I wouldn't need to be hands-free. Can't I just risk my life once to be safer down the road?

Daisy said...

My Mommeh still does not even know how to text from her phone!

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

but really, you were laughing at him right;-)

HumorSmith said...

Communication is a beautiful thing. Even when it goes unheard, it's no problem, because you know what you said and if the recipient didn't catch it, then that's not your fault at all. Attempted communication is quite acceptable.

Just ask Charlie Sheen.

Jill said...

Funny! A coworker was just telling a similar story, except instead of getting mad, HER husband declared that she had better not drink anything while she was out, because she already sounded drunk!

JoJo said...

Technology is a double edged sword that's for sure. I remember the days when my mom would have to call every single client my dad was going to see if she needed to reach him in an emergency (he was a plumber).

Hey if you want a real hearty laugh, go check out the website with all the iPhone auto-correct text messages. It's a scream.

Maureen said...

Tsuki: Ha! Gary-Gory! I'll bet he LOVES that...

Babs: Yeah. The daily "What do you want for dinner"question. Real important stuff.

Welcome Beth!

Ha Stephanie! Once you have it, you get hooked. Fast.

Hatton98: Har! Yeah, I set mine up in the driveway. I can just imagine what the neighbors thought I was doing in there for so long...

Daisy, that's cause she doesn't have a teenager in the house. I would never have learned to text if it hadn't of been for my daughter.

Perpetual Chocoholic: Who moi? Noooooooo..... Okay. YES.

Humor Smith: Well, at least hubby doesn't have a Twitter account. Thank goodness. Actually, he doesn't even read my blog. Thank GOODNESS!

Har Jill! Now THAT's bad communication!

Jo-Jo: Yes, it wasn't that long ago when we DIDN'T need to keep in touch all the time. And when we did, it was for more important things than "pick up some milk on the way home". We lived. I think I have heard of that site, but I need to check it out again, thanks!

Jay said...

Lost in translation, huh? I wonder what your car was actually saying to him ... if anything? LOL!

Sounds funny, but in fact would probably be as distracting and potentially dangerous as those nasty old hold-it-in-your-hand phones.

Janet said...

haha Gotta love high-tech stuff that DOES NOT WORK!

Lazarus said...

I hate the Bluetooth-in-car technology, it sucks! Funny post though, that's one good thing it produces!

taio said...


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Painting Tips and Tricks said...

Technology is really interesting. This blog is too! Thanks for sharing this!...Daniel

Blair Ivey said...

Is this blog moribund?

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